San Francisco! Hopefully there's a MacMillan and Wife reality tour where you dress in bad plaid polyester leisure suits and solve crimes with a glass of scotch in your hand.

A Deuce Bigalow sequel? Why? Oh god why?

Finally! Someone mentions Armstrong's legal wranglings. Lance running for politics? Think twice with all those skeletons in your closet. And your love of suing everybody won't play very well in a political campaign.

Good ridance Lance. You've provided 7 years of the most uninspiring/uninteresting Tours. Kind of like watching the the New Jersey Devils and other trap playing teams boring us in the NHL finals. And not that I don't think the others aren't doped, I'm really looking forward to an end of the hypocrisy that accompanies the endless masturbation over of what a great champion you are.

"Enlist one of your friends as a 'Crotch-Buddy'. Have him concern himself with the safety of your scrotum. Remind him publicly that he is your 'Crotch-Buddy'. Remind him in front of girls."

"Riding escalators is both fun and convenient. But please remember to wear slacks while you enjoy the mechanical comfort of a moving staircase. And never sit on an escalator tread, even if the escalator is not in service"

I'm deep in avoidance mode this morning. Mainly because I don't want to deal with someone who's possible the most anal retentive person I've ever met. So anal that they even walk like there's a massively thick pole up their ass. So I'm taking the time to print off a Brock Samson license and getting some handy advice (heehee I said handy) from the Scrotal Safety Commission. Maybe i'll mark my time as professional development.

Gallery of Crime Comic Books of the 1940s and 1950s. And judging by the covers, there was a lot of scantilly clad women starting prison riots and shooting people in the mid-century.

Saw this link for a reworking of Total Eclipse of the Heart with household appliances on the Music For Maniacs and Music for Robots sites. What can I say other than it's a vast improvement over the original.

Oh it's Harry Potter pandamoaning. Can't say I have any desire in reading any of these books but someone dying in this one makes it sound marginally more interesting. If it's Harry who dies and it's a horrible and brutal death I'll consider reading it. Check that. I'll consider reading the book if the story involves Harry shooting heroin with Pete Doherty then getting the most satisfying anal probe of his life by aliens.

VICTORY IS MINE! Damn bathroom sink and Frankenstein 60s plumbing begone. Look out pink toilet I'm coming for you next. The only decision is whether to do it myself or pay to have someone else deal with the 40 year stalactite of old man poo that's more than likely lurking within.

And have I mentioned how surreal this week has been? Feel like a universal radio receiver with no tuner.

I think i got a raise today but I'm not sure.

There seems to be a large amount of funeral home flyers in my mail. They obviously know the average age of many residents in the complex.

Venture Brothers. Awesome when you're up late with insomnia. Almost as good as Harvey Birdman. Ooooo and Adult Swim redid their site

Venetian marble April 67 - once the top was finally pulled off the cabinet the full description is revealed. Apparently Venice is where faux plastic gold flake and toupe viened marble occurs naturally. Where else but the Dolomites would one quarry fine stone like this for cathedrals and alters.

The accuracy of the cable company's appointments are great. "We'll be there sometime between 9-12". Okay maybe I'll pay my bill sometime between august and december. In the meantime, the water in the building has been turned off for plumbing work most of the day. Excellent. No extra coffee for me this morning.

This damn counter top is becoming the bane of my existence. Too awkward and heavy to move by myself. It's become possessed and won't get out of my house; clinging to the cabinet to thwart my every effort to get rid of it.

J. Peterman didn't win Dancing with the Stars. Wait till Breakdancing with the Stars happens because Evander is going to kick it old school style.

Since the topic came up in the office...Lucky Dog the history of the Dogs playing poker painting.

Spotted this on my way out of the building behind the previously closed door of the lounge. A room isn't complete without a velvet painting of dogs playing pool. Together with the failed Bob Ross style paintings in the other building, the public art collection in the condo complex continues to amaze.

One man's cover of the entire Super Mario World soundtrack. Damn that Butter Bridge

Since this year's Tour has begun in dismall fashion yet again - my seventh annual sour grapes article link. Plus I'm tired of seeing fat smokers with those damn yellow wrist bands. Lance guilty of doping under US Anti-Doping Agency's common-sense standard.

80% of apartment painting done. The place is now super duper contrast of Benjamin Moore Tawny Daylily in your face orangy-red and ultra bright Snowfall White. Briefly thought about using Vermilion but being the magpie I am, I borrowed another Monkey idea and went with the orange-red. Just because I could. And it's good and crazy looking in the entry way compared to the mossy green or cappuccino colours I've noticed in other units.

Thank god it only Fryday the laundry is closed and not Broil or Poachday.